I am a 21-year-old married woman. I love my husband so much. My only problem in this marriage right now is that I don’t enjoy intimacy. It’s not about the size of my husband—he is a full package.

The truth is, I had a dark past where I have been with different men from a young age. I think I started when I was th(ir)teen. I have changed. My husband knows this. He knows everything about my story. I also told him that I don’t really enjoy intimacy or reach ɔrgasm like other women do. The only time I can is when I do it myself.

When I’m with my husband, I always hope I’ll get there, but I don’t. Instead, I start feeling sore because I’m not feeling anything.

He is good with his fingers, oh, he plays me like a violin. His tongue game is fire. And when it gets to the main show and he goes all in, it feels like home. Yet none of these magical skills turn me into a blabbering mess who has experienced too much pleasure.

Even in the past, when I was with other men, I never used to get there. I didn’t mind back then. Maybe I was too young to care about those things. But now I do—I want to experience it like other women.

Unfortunately, I have become worse since I got pregnant. I don’t even have feelings for intimacy anymore. It makes me feel sorry for my husband, because it looks like I am rejecting him. I swear it’s not intentional. Sometimes I even force myself to give in, but still nothing happens. Please, what should I do? I think I need help.