Relationships are more successful and prosperous when you focus on perfecting your character for your partner than when you focus on your partner perfecting her character to suit you.

Focusing on your own errors in character in that relationship helps you to be less judgemental and more merciful to your partner. Because it’s possible to so much focus on the imperfections of your partner to an extent of losing sight of your own imperfections and things you need to work on.

Worse of all is when you begin to use your partner’s imperfections to justify your imperfections, you will become worse and worse. That’s what is called AN EYE FOR AN EYE. A relationship must be a place of growth and that growth is only possible when we are gracious and merciful enough to accommodate the imperfections of our partners as they grow. Which is only possible If we focus on improving ourselves too. When you begin to examine your own character more than you examine your partner’s behavior you will discover that it’s not very easy for a person to change overnight therefore you will be more patient with your partner as you are patient with yourself.

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One of the ancient theologians said, “a pharisee is harder on others but soft on himself”. Be soft on your partner when it comes to correction just like you are soft on yourself. Listen to teachings on relationships not for the sake of gathering information to use against your partner but to improve yourself.